Now this is not normally something I would talk about in this space but it has become a rather important subject in my life lately. Let me explain from the beginning.
So of late I have struggled to keep up with work & home life and the strain has become to much to the point where I feel I am not performing to the best of my ability at work, I am not being a great mother or a wife. In fact I have felt rather inadequate in everything that I do.
So for those of you who do not know what I do I work in Marketing which is often more than a full time job, to make it worse I work in an industry which is mostly male dominated. I feel that I often have to work twice as hard to prove my worth. I commute for an hour and half each day which does stretch the day out. This often leads to little time at home, a messy looking house and very little quality time with the Mr and little lady. Because of this things have suffered and I don't feel I have put in the effort with the things I love to do which includes spending time with my family, creating and of course my blogs have suffered (I also write a marketing blog to keep a log of my work progress). This week I was close to deleting both of my blogs.
Instead I ended up having a good chat with Mrs ID who helped me understand my thought process. I am basically trying to be too many things to too many people really. I have worked hard to get where I am in my career recently finishing my second Chartered Institute of Marketing qualification and I have always been very career focused. I also try to be a wife, a mother, a friend and many other things. Ive tried to fit all the thing in that a full time mum does at the same time as trying to develop a career, along with trying to keep up with my friends that have more time than me. This is the dilemma most working women in today's society suffer what is important a career or being a wife & a mum.
The modern woman's dilemma, try to be the traditional creative, stay at home mummy or the career woman that has to compete with men to prove they are capable of the same things.
It makes me angry that I am expected (yes expected) to be so many things, so from now on I am me, I don't care what people think of me. I will work hard at work and when I am at home I will enjoy my family and hobbies. I only have so many hours in a day and I need to lower my expectations of what I can fit into that day! I cannot compete with you & I do not wish to!
So my blog from this day will reflect me, the activities I partake in and the life I lead. I would be very happy if you would like to join me on this journey to becoming a happier individual and letting go of what others expect of me.
Thanks for visiting me at the Little House in the Corner and reading my very personal message, hope you will call again soon.